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Founded in 2002, the blog here continues to be a space of daily conversation about the science of mind and its implications and applications
The hiatus here between late-May and now mid-July will be satisfied in the upcoming book, Path. In the meantime, it will resume in the spirit of nuance. I'll be featuring new distinctions across topics and disciplines.
The idea is that the more distinction we have, the more options we have. Life is rich in options.
When we focus attention on and work from assumptions, we don't give attention to our unknowns, which causes them to accumulate and cause noise and drag on the process. This puts goals and plans at risk because they are assumption based. Goals and plans in this way actually create more uncertainty than we would have without them.
Life is messy. Organizing the messiness of life through pathcrafting is the dynamic process of turning the mess of unknowns into a path of actionable questions in the direction of our interests. It makes any mess figureoutable.
Another way to get clear on things we consider values and priorities is thinking about our essentials. This is the answer to the question: What is essential here? It's an elegant and effective way to separate signal from noise. It focuses us.
Calmness in the face of challenge is the essence of equanimity. It's what we experience in organizing chaos. It allows us to venture into the unfamiliar. It makes it more possible for us to take on new projects, explore new opportunities, learn new things, solve new problems, understand new perspectives.
The advantages of asking for help are many. It shows appreciation of the gifts and time of others. It keeps open the door for mutual support. It is sometimes the only efficient way to get unstuck, beyond an obstacle or turn in the path. It fuels learning. It reminds us of how most of our success is due to the world around us.
We create unnecessary and counterproductive anxiety by demanding that we put deadlines on everything. We can put all kinds of time into any interest and move in any compelling direction at any tempo that time and resources can support. We get there exactly when it's possible to arrive.
Listening with judgment is reactive listening. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with being judgmental. Listening beyond judgment is possible every time we listen with curiosity. Wonder is the opposite of assessment. It makes us less reactive, which opens up a larger space for understanding.
It's possible to surround ourselves and enrich our life with people who inspire us with their passion, wisdom, or energy.
There are people who experience great interest and joy in growing an expertise in just about any knowledge or practice domain. They are ones who enjoys with discrimination and appreciation of subtleties in any kind of food, beverage, writing, music, film, wildlife. It's something each of us has access to.
Journaling allows us to translate into words feelings that emerge in spaces without words. This gives us more to support wider and deeper, and more personal and honest, conversations in any context.
Some people stay active from a deep intolerance of inactivity. It could be an intolerance of an interior life. The addiction to activity can strengthen the intolerance. It's a potential opportunity space.
I recently met a barista who referred to as "an artist," in painting, who hasn't painted in "a while" and "really needs to get back to it." It was a good reminder that we can claim an identity that doesn't claim all of our time. She is likely is also, beyond talented barista, a friend, sister, daughter, neighbor, student, gardener, or any other number of things.
Does the physical state of our personal and work spaces reflect the quality of our mental and emotional spaces, and vice versa? If so, simplifying, beautifying, organizing, and cleaning both is necessary for either.
Reality is, family members are free to have any expectations they believe are reasonable, earned, or entitled. Other family members are equally free to consider these expectations as irrational, unreasonable, toxic, unjustified or the opposites.
The whole conversation about what anyone "owes" anyone is in part about the alignment or conflict between and among expectations. Conflict can fuel divisive alliances and alienations. Alignments help everyone grow. Empathic listening is a condition of alignment.
Some people, certainty not all people, want to be followers. The reasons can be many. They appreciate leaders who help them be better followers. Others, not so much. If they think they need leaders it's leaders who support their sense of confidence, competence, connections, and growth.
There are multiple options in responding to the suffering of others, whether they are strangers or significant others. They live along a continuum including apathy, blame, resonance, and helpfulness.
Apathy is a decision to give no attention to their suffering, or simply lacking interest in it. Blame is an assessment of the intolerance of their suffering, and the causes of it. Resonance is having a sense of understanding with their unique suffering. Helpfulness is curiosity about their suffering and a desire to do what we can to diminish it, its causes, and its symptoms.
It's possible to feel helpless over anything we consider a force of influence in our world that we don't think we have any influence over. This can include politics, religion, social trends, generational and gender differences.
It's an unknown and often unknowable how much impact our voice and actions have in our world. We create small pockets of agency when our intention is simply to impact what we can see.
I'm interested in what would make it possible for everyone on the planet to live and work with an entrepreneurial mindset. It would take storytelling, teaching, and invitations.
Listening to our own endless flow of inner commentary is a practice of mindfulness as well as a way of practicing unrestricted listening with others. It centers us, which some would refer to as a spiritual practice. We could argue that all spiritual practice is a listening, and all listening is a spiritual practice.
